GUTTERGAUNT

September 2005

September 2 2005: Doing Something to Help

I makes me sick that every time the U.S. gets hit by some major disaster like Hurricane Katrina, there are always a bunch of Religious Right shitheads proclaiming that it's God punishing the nation for tolerating homosexuality and abortion. What if it's God punishing us for letting self-righteous homophobic bigots run the country?

I guess that explaining why the destruction and suffering is right and just is a lot easier than actually doing something to help.

Speaking of which, you can click here to donate to the American Red Cross relief efforts.

Those of us who have websites full of hot girl-on-girl bondage and domination and other kinky sex stuff get lots of traffic from search engines (the use of the phrases "hot girl-on-girl bondage and domination" and "kinky sex" just then was designed to bring more search engine traffic to this page, in fact). So we kinky webmasters and webmistresses (or webslaves, as the case may be) are in an especially good position to help in times like this. Lure the crowds in with the kinky sex, then hit them with the question: if you've got time to look for sexy writing on the Internet, surely you've got time to click on this link and donate something to help relieve the suffering of your fellow citizens?

September 6 2005: The Good News

"There is a God, and she's an Irish lesbian." -- Whiskey O'Reilly, Angels 2200

September 17 2005: Literati

Neige emailed me a couple of weeks ago to inform me that she’d be dropping by on Thursday evening (the 8th) for an inspection visit. She hinted that Mistress Yoko might be joining us via Yahoo Messenger this time, and that I was in for some “fun,” which made me very nervous indeed.

After she made me strip naked for the usual inspection, she had me log onto Messenger, and then the two of us just hung out and talked while we waited for Mistress Yoko to log in and join us. I was surprised that Neige didn’t tie me up or shackle me to my chair or rig me up with those evil vibrating toys, as has been the case in the past when Mistress Yoko has chosen to amuse herself at my expense via Messenger. I didn’t know whether to be relieved, or worried about what new evils might be afoot.

Although she didn’t tie me or put those toys in me or do anything but lounge around talking with me, Neige wouldn’t let me put my clothes back on, either, not even my panties.

Soon Mistress Yoko showed up on Messenger. She informed me that she had finally tallied all of the “Mistress Disrespect Points” that I’d racked up by mouthing off to her in the weeks leading up to that fateful wrestling match this past May. I had 1000 Mistress Disrespect Points (MDPs) to “work off,” she told me. I don’t know whether she actually has a system for calculating MDPs, or whether she just arbitrarily assigns a nice, big, round number of them every time she decides I’m being disrespectful. As she’s made abundantly clear, I’m in no position to demand any kind of fairness in these matters.

Mistress Yoko said that whenever I worked off all my MDPs, she’d free me from my slavery. This was unexpected good news, in a way, because under the terms of our bet on the wrestling match in May, made in a rash moment of overconfidence, she’s entitled to keep me as her slave permanently. She’d sort of hinted a little while ago that she’d thought about freeing me someday, but knowing how much she enjoys owning me, I hadn’t expected her to make an offer like this anytime soon.

Of course, I knew that “working off” MDPs was probably going to involve me suffering many uncomfortable indignities for Mistress Yoko’s amusement. And I had an unpleasant suspicion that working off 1000 of them could take a very long time. I was also unhappy to learn that all the torments I’d suffered at Mistress Yoko’s hands (well, at Neige’s hands, on Mistress Yoko’s instructions) in the months that I’d been her slave weren’t going to count against my MDP score... even though I’ve already been punished many times over since May for my disrespect, apparently it doesn’t count, just because Mistress Yoko hadn’t yet got around to tallying all the MDPs at the time. So now I had to start from square one.

Anyway, Mistress Yoko informed me that I was going to work off my MDPs by playing Literati with her. Literati is Yahoo’s online knockoff of Scrabble (those of you who read Mistress Yoko’s blog know how much she loves Scrabble). This sounded like a surprisingly cushy way to work off MDPs, since I share Mistress Yoko’s love of word games and certainly wouldn’t regard it as a punishment to have to play them with her!

But then she explained the rules: I only worked off MDPs if I won. If I won, then one MDP would be deducted from my MDP total for every point that I won by. If I lost, then my MDP total would remain unchanged, and Neige would spank me, one swat for every point I lost by. Plus, after the spanking, I would receive an additional surprise punishment of Mistress Yoko’s choice (she said she and Neige had already decided what the punishment would be this time).

So we logged onto Yahoo Games, and played a hard and fast game of Literati. Mistress Yoko set it on timed play, like a speed chess match: we each had a 15-minute clock, and if someone’s time ran out before the end of the game, they lost, which made it really intense (as it turned out, both of us still had a few minutes left on our clocks at the end of the game).

Mistress Yoko won this time, much to my chagrin, but it was really, really close... she only beat me by 8 points! We’re really evenly matched, there were plenty of times that I was ahead, and the outcome was in doubt until the very end!

I was at a disadvantage, because although I used to play Scrabble a lot, it was my first time playing Literati. I also think it was a major psychological disadvantage to have to play naked! Especially while worrying about what might be done to my naked body if I lost!

Psychology is a funny thing... Mistress Yoko mentioned at some point in the game (players can text-message each other while they play) that her boyfriend Lipby (who I think is a really good guy, by the way) was watching the game. And I got totally embarrassed that I was playing naked while he was watching the game, even though of course he couldn’t see me, all he could see was the moves I made in the game when they showed up on Mistress Yoko’s monitor! So I don’t know why I got so embarrassed... maybe it was just having someone witness me being in “slave mode”... I mean, you all read all about my slavery in this blog, but it’s different in realtime... the “me” that I write about in past tense, and that you read about later when I’m off at work or something, feels safely separated by time from the “me” of the moment. But with realtime text-messaging, I don’t have that sense of separation... it feels very exposed. For instance, when I’m on Yahoo Messenger with Mistress Yoko and she makes me continue to reply to her while she has Niege torment me with the vibrating toys or whatever... I hate that, because I make typos, and I know that she can tell by the typos how much she’s getting to me.

Anyway, like I was saying, I feel I was at a significant disadvantage in certain ways. So I’m eager to play again... I think that in the future, I’ll be able to win pretty often.

But I didn’t win this time. And even more distressingly, Mistress Yoko decided that some of my competitive banter during the game was disrespectful, and she added 200 more MDPs to my total! So I ended up worse of in every way! I wasn’t even doing any real trash-talking, either, not compared to how I usually talk when I’m being competitive. But that’s part of what sucks about being a slave... Mistress Yoko gets to set the standards of what’s respectful and what isn’t, it doesn’t matter whether I think it’s fair.

So now I’ve got 1200 MDPs to work off before I can be free of my humiliating slavery. If I’m ever going to win my freedom by playing Literati against Mistress Yoko, I’m going to have to get her to play for higher stakes than just one MDP per point. But what would higher stakes mean for me if I lost?

Speaking of which, I know that Mistress Yoko wants me to write about my punishment for losing this time. After all, the humiliation of having everyone read about it is always part of the punishment.

After the game, Mistress Yoko signed off to go watch football with Lipby, and left me in Neige’s hands. I hate that... it’s bad enough that Mistress Yoko gets to have me punished whenever it pleases her, and even worse that she teases me about it, but it’s still worse knowing that while I’m suffering whatever discomforts she’s devised for me, she’s off relaxing and enjoying herself. Neige loves to rub that in, too. After Mistress Yoko signed off, Neige tied me spreadeagled to the bed, face down. still naked, of course. Then she made me wait like that for a while. “What do you think your Mistress is doing now?” she teased. “Probably snuggling up on the couch with her boyfriend, watching the game, having a snack... she’s having a much better evening than you are, that’s for sure.”

Neige took her sweet time giving me the 8 swats on my naked bottom that my 8-point loss had earned me. Then she waited a while longer, teasing me (verbally and physically) for about 15 minutes before giving me the surprise punishment decreed by Mistress Yoko. The surprise punishment turned out to be a session of anal tickle torture with the dreaded electric toothbrush. As you may recall, this is one of the tortures that was inflicted on me in May, when I lost the big wrestling match. It is one of the most terrible torments I’ve ever experienced; I’d rather have 8 hundred spankings than even 30 seconds of the unbearable tickling of that awful, buzzing toothbrush on my tender anus. And this was a lot more than 30 seconds. I have no idea how long it was. Neige took plenty of breaks to torture me with suspense and watch me squirm and plead. It was awful! I think that was a horribly cruel and unfair punishment for Mistress Yoko to give me!

I’ve got to hand it to Mistress Yoko, though... this Literati challenge, which looks like it will become an ongoing thing, was a great idea! One thing that Mistress Yoko and I have in common is that we’re both highly competitive. We love a good, fierce game, a good bet, and getting to rub it in when we win. Of course, if I win, I don’t get to rub it in, since I’m still a slave until I can work off all those MDPs. So that’s pretty unfair, especially since when Mistress Yoko wins, she gets to rub it in in some very evil ways!

Of course, Mistress Yoko is quite unmoved by all my complaints of unfairness, because she knows full well that if our situations were reversed, she’d be getting just the same treatment she’s giving me.

September 22 2005: Storybook

A couple of weeks ago, Nicky and I briefly tried switching our sites to a new web hosting service (new for us, anyway), DreamHost. DreamHost’s service sucked, so we switched back to our old host, but there was one thing I did really love about DreamHost: the Dreambook. Basically, the Dreambook is a web page, linked to from your website, that serves as a “guestbook.” The Dreambook displays comments added by readers, and anyone can add a comment by clicking a link at the bottom of the Dreambook page. Comments can be really long, so many people use Dreambooks as discussion sites or sites for people to share stories of one kind or another. I’ve found a number of Dreambooks out there that are collections of fun, sexy, kinky stories... someone sets up the Dreambook, gives it a title and description explaining what kind of stories the site is dedicated to, and then acts as moderator to keep trolls and off-topic writers away... and the page slowly but surely fills up with fun stories for everyone to enjoy!

Well, it turns out that I don’t have to be a DreamHost customer to have my own Dreambook. Anyone can start a Dreambook for free, with the only catch being that DreamHost gets to put ugly banner ads at the top of the page. So I’m pleased to announce the premiere of my own Dreambook, Lila’s Storybook, where my readers can share their own stories of whatever kinky girl/girl erotic mayhem and evil fun they’ve perpetrated, had perpetrated upon them, or witnessed. Check it out at

http://books.dreambook.com/guttergaunt/stories.html

Ignore the annoying banner ad, which probably isn’t even in black and white, dammit.

Be the first one to post a story, unless someone else has already done that by the time you get there, in which case you can be the second or third or whatever.

Note that I’m also still accepting well-polished stories for posting in the Art & Writing section of this site, as per the Submission Guidelines. After all, that policy is an offer backed by Mistress Yoko, so I’m not allowed to rescind it. But no one’s been taking advantage of that offer anyway, and I think that’s because it’s intimidating to have to polish up a story and submit it for approval and its own page and stuff... I know I’d be too intimidated to contribute to seek publication on someone else’s site like that. I think my Dreambook will be less intimidating... you can just type a quick anecdote into it, anonymously if you want, hit the “Sign the Book” button, and you’re done. I know that some of the kinky Dreambooks out there end up getting a lot of stories, once they get rolling. Though I don’t know how long something like this takes to hit the “get rolling” point... I hope it doesn’t sit empty for too many weeks! I know I’m seriously limiting the number of stories I’ll get by limiting my Dreambook to all-girl stories, but I’m big on the Girl Power, Rosie the Riviter “We Can Do It” stuff these days... and besides, a lot of the BDSM-type guy/girl stories I’ve seen out there get brutal and ugly in a way that I don’t want here... the girl/girl stuff has a way of staying fun even when it’s cruel. Because girls rock, I guess.

Complete change of subject: Mistress Yoko posted the following blogging meme in her blog today: