April 2005
April 1 2005: The Rules of Engagement
I'm getting married! His name is Bill and we've been seeing each other in secret since last June, though we've never slept together because he's a Mormon, so no sex until the honeymoon... He finally popped the question last night, diamond ring and all, and we'll be flying up to Salt Lake City in a couple of weeks so I can meet his family...
April Fool.
Were you fooled?
Maybe just a little?
Speaking of fools and big events, Neige has finally been foolish enough to agree to a date for our big wrestling match: Sunday, May 8.
For a while there, I thought that she was just going to keep on stalling forever... which would have been much smarter of her, but not terribly fun for me or you faithful readers. But she's actually convinced herself that she's ready to take me on now, poor thing.
The rules: Neige and I meet in my apartment in the late afternoon, strip down to our underwear, and wrestle on my bed until one of us (me) succeeds in thoroughly binding the other one (her) with some of the various restraints that will be liberally scattered around within easy reach.
The winner (me) gets to do whatever she wants to with the loser (her) until midnight (over seven hours, even assuming that she actually manages to put up an unusually long struggle). The only limitations: no photos, no lasting damage to person or property, no leaving physical marks that can't be concealed by clothing (also known as the "No Mohawks Rule").
Mistress Yoko will be in contact via email to help decide Neige's fate. It will be fun being the one carrying out Mistress Yoko's evil whims for once, instead of being the victim of them! Poor Neige... Mistress Yoko has such a delightfully cruel and playful imagination, as I've had altogether too much occasion to learn!
And I've got quite the cruel streak myself, of course, which I'm quite looking forward to exercising. I've got some major scores to settle with little Neige, after what she did to me when I lost our Super Bowl bet back in February! Yes, I've got big plans for her this time. I almost feel sorry for her... but not quite.
The main thing that makes me almost feel sorry for her is that she's the only one who thinks she's got the slightest chance of winning. A shame, too, because I really wish that I could get Valkyrie and/or Mistress Yoko to make some kind of bet against me on the outcome. That would make my victory even sweeter, especially since I've never yet been able to score even the tiniest victory over Mistress Yoko... during the Memorial Day bet last year, she had me painfully punished for disrespectfully underestimating her... and then, in the incident of the Super Bowl bet in February, not only did she and Neige thoroughly humiliate me, she ended up owning me! So just once, I'd like to win one against her... but no, she and Valkyrie are both far too smart to bet against me on this one... both of them know as well as I do that Neige has no chance!
Hmm... I wonder if Jennifer B. or Geminica still read this site... haven't heard from either one in ages... maybe one of them would bet against me... No? Oh, well... I guess seven hours of torturing Neige will be enough of a truimph on its own! Read all about it, right here, on May 8!
April 2 2005: Bwa Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Cue triumphant supervillain laughter: Bwa ha ha ha ha!
Yoko was actually gullible enough to make a bet with me on my battle with Neige! And a big bet, too! Oh, this is so good I must be dreaming!
Since Neige has never even come close to beating me, or even putting up a good fight, in all the times we’ve wrestled, I thought that I had no chance of provoking anyone into betting against me on this… but I thought that I might as well try, and boy did it pay off! I can’t believe Yoko was foolish enough to take the bait!
Ha! I don’t need to call her “Mistress Yoko” anymore, because after I win this bet, she won’t own me anymore… and between now and when I win, she’s got no way to do anything to me! The tables are finally turning…
Here’s how it happened… After I posted the previous entry, Yoko wrote to me and said:
So sure you're going to win that you're suggesting that you would want me, your mistress, to bet against you?
So I wrote back:
Oh, yes, I am most definitely going to win this one... and yes, Mistress, I'm quite eager to bet on it! After the blows my pride took in February, I want this victory to be as big as possible!
So Yoko proposed a bet, but it wasn’t a very good one, from my perspective, because she wasn’t really risking anything in it… basically, I would get punished if I lost, which would have happened anyway, and Yoko would help me punish Neige if I won, which wouldn’t really give me any kind of victory over Yoko herself, which is what I really wanted.
I decided to see if I could goad Yoko into a real bet. Here are the terms that I proposed to her (naturally, I’d never propose anything like this if I wasn’t 100% assured of my victory… but I am):
If I win, I've won my freedom, and am no longer your slave. Furthermore, to repay you for the humiliation of my enslavement, you get a spanking. After all, you've now got someone in your life who can administer one! So, within 2 days of my victory (i.e., by the night of Tuesday, May 10), you must explain the situation to your boyfriend, and humbly request that he deliver at least 50 good hard swats to your little fanny. Afterward, I want emails from both him and you, verifying that the spanking has been properly done.
Of course, for all I know, your boyfriend might not be into spanking you. If he isn't willing to spank you, then you'll have one week (after the original 2 day deadline) to find another friend of yours who's willing to give you the spanking (a female friend, of course, so as not to make your boyfriend jealous).
Whoever ends up administering the spanking, you must of course be naked for it.
Hee hee... these bets are a little scarier when you're really risking some personal humiliation, aren't they? Now we find out how brave you are when you've really got something at stake... I'll understand if you back down from this one!
Ooh, but what if Neige wins the wrestling match, and you win the bet? Not that that will happen of course. How confident am I that I'm going to win? How eager am I to tempt you into getting that well-deserved spanking? Here's what I'm offering...
If you win the bet, I'm your long-distance slave permanently. You can dictate the rules of my slavery however you like: how I'm to address and behave toward you privately or publicly, any private or public demonstrations of subservience I must make... and I have to allow you to send Neige and/or Valkyrie around to my place to punish me anytime you see fit, whether for disrespect or just for your amusement!
And, of course, if Neige wins, you can have her punish me in any other way that you think is appropriate, for my impudence in proposing a bet like this!
How about it, Mistress? I'm putting lot at stake here... do you dare to put your own little butt on the line as well?
Yoko replied:
Spanking! "50 good hard swats"? Lila, that is too much! Do you realize that I'm not going to be able to do my job if I lose? I sit down all day at the computer-- I won't be able to sit!
Ha! What a wimp! I wrote back:
Aww, poor baby! Obviously, we need to toughen up that tender little bottom of yours! And there'll be plenty of opportunity for that... I'm sure that once he's discovered how fun it is to spank you, your boyfriend won't need the excuse of a bet to do it again! Maybe it will give him other ideas, too...
And of course, if you want payback after losing this bet, you'll have to put a lot more at stake on the next bet! I went easy this time because I knew you wouldn't have the guts to risk anything more... and from your whining about having to take a mere 50 swats, I see I was right!
When you stand in front of him naked and ready for your spanking, be sure to tell him not to stop when you wimp out and start begging and crying!
Well, of course, I had her then! There was no way she could back down from that! Sure enough, she wrote:
You impudent wench! Fine, I'll accept the bet, but you're going to pay for this!
And I replied:
Oh, am I? When? I'll win this one, and then you won't own me anymore, so I won't have to submit to anything you dish out unless you make another bet with me and win it! And like I said, you'll have to bet a whole lot next time...
Enjoy the 5 weeks of waiting for your spanking!
I’m going to have a very pleasant 5 weeks, myself, thinking about how nervous Yoko and Neige will be getting. And come May 8, things are going to get even more fun… for me, at least!
April 3 2005: Hero
Considering that I’m about as thoroughly lapsed as a lapsed Catholic can be, I was surprised how much the passing of Pope John Paul II affected me. He was my hero, back when he was first elected to the papacy, when I was an innocent wee Catholic schoolgirl of eight or nine years old. I knew nothing, in those innocent young days, of issues like how the Church’s stand on contraception (which John Paul II could have changed, but chose to staunchly support to the end) contributed to overpopulation, and thus to the very poverty and starvation that the Church’s Third World missionaries claimed to be fighting… All I knew were the stories that wonderful old Father M. told about this new Pope, about how he championed the oppressed workers in Poland, a land where even men of the cloth could be arrested for speaking out for freedom… about what a good-hearted man he was, and about how he was the first non-Italian Pope in over 400 years.
I thought the world of old Father M., and Father M. thought the world of John Paul II. I still remember the party our church threw on the eve of John Paul II’s inauguration, and all the adults in our congregation bursting into thunderous applause when Father M. raised his glass and exclaimed, “Now that the Good Lord has seen fit to give his children a Polish Pope, can an Irish Pope be far behind?”
Of course, as I grew older, less innocent, and more sophisticated, I came to dislike many of John Paul II’s conservative policies… not only on contraception, but on abortion, on homosexuality, on keeping women out of the priesthood… But I also respected all the work he did on reconciling the Church’s old rifts with other faiths. And a few years ago, when I read in the paper that he’d spoken out against the invasion of Iraq, I actually prayed a little prayer of gratitude, and, lapsed as I was, felt proud to be a Catholic.
April 5 2005: My Cup Runneth Over
Ooh, this is just too good to be true! First Yoko was foolish enough to bet against me in my battle with Neige, and now Valkyrie has joined her!
Here’s the email with which Valkyrie has sealed her own doom:
My Dear Uppity Little Brat,
If Yoko’s betting against you, then so am I! At first it was hard for me to imagine that Neige could have a chance against you, but I have a lot of confidence in Yoko’s judgment… enough to make me change my mind and put myself at risk in a high-stakes bet with you! Simply put, Yoko is your better, and I believe that she will always triumph over you one way or another. I want to be a part of this triumph, so that when you lose and become a toy for Yoko’s amusement, she’ll let me play with you, too!
Here’s the bet I’m offering: right now, my boyfriend still doesn’t know about your website, because he’s got a bit of an evil streak, and I don’t want that picture you posted, of me all bound and gagged and shaved, to give him any ideas. If you beat Neige, I’ll show my boyfriend your site, and tell him that he’s free to get in touch with you and ask for your suggestions on future bedroom activities. Yes, I know what a blank check I’m handing you here… I’m quite aware of how much trouble I could be in if I lose, though I’m sure you’ll be happy to remind me of it anyway…
Of course, if I’m gambling a blank check, then you have to, too! If you lose, then I’ll be advising Yoko as she decides your punishment… and I’ll keep on advising her in the future, throughout your long, long slavery, giving her ideas about the fun she can have with you! I’ll always be around to help her make your life interesting!
How about it, brat? Do we have a bet, or are you starting to chicken out now?
Double-darin’ ya,
Valkyrie
Oh, my dear foolish Valkyrie… I accept, of course!
Hee hee! Now I’ve got Neige, Yoko, and Valkyrie! What a fun rest of the year I’m going to have, with all three of them as my bitches!
April 16 2005: Anticipation, Life, and a Survey
Three weeks to go (well, three weeks and a day) until my big wrestling match with Neige. Oh, the fun I have planned for her!
I’ve been enjoying taunting Neige, Valkyrie, and Yoko in our occasional email exchanges… I’ll bet they’re all getting pretty nervous, though of course they put up a brave front. I know Yoko’s probably thinking an awful lot about that spanking she’s got coming! Hee hee… there’s no feeling quite like the anticipation when you know you’ve got a spanking coming… kind of makes you very aware of your butt… doesn’t it, Yoko? Especially around the lucky person who’ll be delivering the spanking… Like I wrote to Yoko yesterday, I bet her boyfriend is going to have a lot of fun paddling those little naked buns of hers!
Meanwhile, the rest of my life is going quite nicely, too. I’ve been on my intense aerobics and pilates regimen for one year now, and I’m in the best shape of my life. I actually like how I look these days. Hair is very long now, longest it’s been for a long time. Think I’ll keep it that way for a while.
Recent reading: The Mole People, nonfiction about people who live in the networks of tunnels under New York City. Of course, it’s an oldish book, from before Giuliani was mayor… things could be different now…
Also all of the graphic novels of Frank Miller (yeah, all of them, from Ronin and Wolverine all the way up through the Sin City books… doing my part to support my local comic shop…), as preparation for seeing the Sin City movie. Haven’t seen it yet… I can’t handle crowds, so I always wait until a movie’s been out long enough for everyone else to have seen it already.
Interestingly, New York’s Mole People are a regular theme in early Frank Miller.
While I’m writing all this random stuff, here’s a question that’s been on my mind lately: who’s reading this blog these days? I know who a few of my current readers are, because I get email from them now and then… but when I check my server logs, I see that there are a lot more frequent visitors than the handful I’ve heard from. And there are lots of old readers who I haven’t heard from in a while, even though my total readership seems to have increased. So who’s out there? If I’ve never heard from you before, or if it’s been a long time (Geminica? Jennifer? Ace?) drop me an email sometime (lila at [name of this site] dot com), just to say hi… tell me who you are, how long you’ve been reading, how you discovered this site, what you like about it… stuff like that. I’m not good about answering emails, but I’ll read them all, and interesting stories, comments, and questions may get posted here in this blog (anonymity always respected, of course), or in the FAQ.
April 19 2005: Answers and Questions
Thanks to everyone who’s responded to the previous entry’s reader survey so far. Since this site is mostly about my adventures in girl-on-girl bondage and domination, and since there’s a popular stereotype that the fans of kinky girl-on-girl sex are almost all guys plus a few kinky lesbians, and since I’ve always believed in questioning stereotypes, I’m pleased to announce that half of my responses so far have been from predominantly-straight-identified women. Hah! In yer face, ignorant purveyors of gender stereotyping!
Of course, it was nice to hear from the guys and the kinky lesbians, too!
At the risk of committing some gender stereotyping myself, I have to say that I agree with the (female) reader who suggested that guys are more likely to go for slickly-produced images of girl-on-girl sexual activity, like the stuff that one finds on the kind of porn sites that people pay money to access, and that this site draws a higher percentage of female readers because of what that reader rather flatteringly called its “personal, introspective, engaging, self-revealing nature.”
So far, six of the respondents have asked me what I’m going to do if I lose the wrestling match with Neige. Hah! It’ll never happen! Can you imagine what Niege, Yoko, and Valkyrie would do to me if I lost, after all the trash-talking I’ve been doing? Can you conceive of how much trouble I’d be in? Do you have any idea how humiliating it would be to be permanently owned by Yoko? There’s no way I’d bet something like that if I thought for one moment that I’d have to pay up! Trust me, I’ve wrestled Neige dozens of times, and she’s never even given me a challenging struggle. I’m winning.
But… hypothetically? If I lost? I don’t know… do a whole lot of begging, I guess! Never happen, though.
In other news: am I the only one who’s deeply disturbed at the new Pope’s uncanny physical resemblance to the evil Chancellor/Emperor in the Star Wars movies?